ROMANTIC AND SEXUAL FEELINGS: IS IT ALL RIGHT FOR A GIRL TO ASK A BOY OUT? WHAT IF YOU AND YOUR BEST FRIEND LIKE THE SAME PERSON?
Back in your parents’ day this was a definite no-no. Of course, even back then there were some brave girls who went ahead and asked the boys out. And most girls did everything they could, short of actually asking, in order to get the boys they liked to ask them out. But the ‘rules’ that most people went by said that boys did the asking and girls were supposed to wait to be asked.
Nowadays things have changed. Although there are still some people who think it’s not ‘right’ or ‘proper’ for girls to do the asking, most people don’t see anything at all wrong with a girl taking the initiative. In fact, many people think it’s a great idea. Almost every boy we’ve asked has said he wished more girls would do it. Girls are often in favour of this idea too.
What if you and your best friend like the same person?
If one of you is already dating or going with this person, then we’d say that this person is ‘off limits’. But if the person isn’t ‘taken’, then the two of you need to think about how you’re going to keep your feelings for this person from getting in the way of, or maybe even ruining, your friendship. Here are some possible solutions. You could decide that you’re both going to ‘go for’ the person, but you agree ahead of time not to let it affect your friendship. You could toss a coin. You could decide to let the one with the strongest feelings have the first chance. Of course, the person you like may already be interested in one of you, so he or she may do the deciding. Or the person may not be interested in either of you, so it may not be a problem at all.
Whatever happens, try to keep a sense of humour about it. And remember, at your age romances come and go, but the friendships you make now may last a lifetime. So, don’t lose your friendship over a romance.
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